Deprivation

Petals, she says with a smile~

I am just a figment in a world
Undivided;
Unequipped to contain what should be free.
Since I am what everyone could be

Except...

Something in me is broken and
Fixing it?
Would mean facing a blinding light
In a sterile room.

"Recently that has seemed like the sane option,"
Says Lithium sweetly,
"Wouldn't it be nice?"
It would be, I can't deny

Except...

Who would I be when I came out?
"Who are you now?"
I am a patient blasphemy
In a world undivided
To hold people like me.

Petals, she says~
I've got to hold it together

Except...

I never sleep
And rock bottom always feels like this.


I'M NOT OKAY
But I don't know how to fix it.
I can't just LET GO

Petals~

I CAN'T LET GO AFTER ALL THIS
BECAUSE PRESSING ONE CIRCLE INTO MY THROAT
(means she'll choke)
Is admitting I am not good enough
Strong enough
Smart enough
Stable enough
To keep it together for the rest of them

PETALS, SHE SAYS~

Except...

I'm broken and I can't afford to haul my carcass
To the shop