ahh, i haven't written anything recently. poem-wise that is. tried to work on one, but i couldn't think of anything that rhymed with death besides breath and meth (crytal that is), but those don't work, soooo....i'm trying not to post anything exeptionally suicidal on here. or dark. or creepy. wait...i am those things...damn. ahh, well, i challenged a guy to a game of halo. he says he's very good. i say hah. soooo, i guess i'll practise a little on that. or a lot. i can't get passed this one point in the first game (legendary) and it's driving me insane...
crap. i wish i didn't have to hide what i feel. and that i didn't have to worry about what i would do to other people if i told them. and that i hadn't started a whole nother journal thing becasue i was afraid for people to know. but they do know. they just don't say anything. and it's so obvious what i am. sometimes it's just pointless for me to stick around on this earth. and i keep a knife in my room. lies, all lies. and i live them. and wish that they were true, sometimes. or that i could at least go one day and not feel guilty for drawing my next breath. guilty for everything i've put everyone through. and all i have left to say is...i'm sorry. i'm so sorry for the way that i am. and i want out, but it's so far and i can't reach, i can't touch the door
and it's the last thing i'll ever say to you
if you'll give me the chance to speak
everything that i've said and every tear
every wasted breath that spoke a lie
that denied the obvious blaring truth
would kill my soul more than you'll ever know
and i'm sorry for being this way
so i could tell you one day about the stupid things
i'v done and the lies i've said
i'm sorry forever, and it's all my fault
that my world is going to end.
well, so much for not posting anything depressing anymore...damn it.
Sunday, August 07, 2005
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3 comments:
Its not so much as, you're breaking the law, as it is ,getting caught
hey man what happened to u for such depression.
*Hugs* You know you can always come to me. And without you being the way you are, then you'd be just like everyone else. Unless that's what you want. Which I'm hopeing not, because my little Annie world would not be the same without you. And just think about how weird it would be if you were like one of those little stero type girls at our school...or how about not..it's already giveing me the heebie jeebies. And, My boyfriend will sooo kick your BUTT in Halo. Well, I think so anyway. If he doesn't then my mad skillz will! *evil laugh*
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